In my whole life, I don’t think I have ever reached a goal that I’ve set for myself. It’s very discouraging to come to this realization of ones’ self, and you would think that most people would take this new-found information about themselves and try to overcome it. Unfortunately, I’m not one of those people. All this realization has done is heap on another load of self-doubt and an overwhelming sense of, well, being overwhelmed. I think the sense of feeling overwhelmed when I take on new tasks is the root of my not being able to finish what I’ve started.
As I look around my office now, I realize even the most menial projects I’ve either struggled to get through or have just given up on all together. My closet is like a holding cell of arts and crafts, stranded, but not forgotten. There is a large box filled with toilet paper rolls that I planned on turning into paper flower wall decorations that I saw on Pinterest once. The project will probably never even get the chance to be a “Pinterest Fail” because; it most likely will never be finished. Collecting the rolls was the easiest part, which is still an ongoing thing in my bathroom and in my boyfriends’ office bathroom as well.
When we first moved into our new home I hid about thirty empty toilet paper rolls under the sink cabinet in his bathroom, figuring he’d probably never look under there. It took a few weeks, but eventually, he found them. I think he’s pretty convinced that my DIY wall decoration is never going to happen because I’ve just taken to toilet paper roll hoarding so seamlessly. Who needs a cost effective art instillation when you can just have step 1 shoved into every available space of your home?
I don’t draw the line at paper rolls, though; there are dozens of hook rugs, half knitted scarves, and unfinished stories lying around as well. The unfinished writing thing hurts a lot. I just wish there was some sort of pill I could take, or maybe a tea; they’re doing some pretty crazy shit with tea these days that would help me get my crap together!